


Third Time Lucky

by a_pocket_full_of_fancy_words



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: (and second and third kiss), First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-08
Updated: 2013-08-08
Packaged: 2017-12-22 18:35:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/916626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_pocket_full_of_fancy_words/pseuds/a_pocket_full_of_fancy_words
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Leonard kisses Jim Kirk was at the end of their second year of the Academy, on Jim's 25th birthday and the 25th anniversary of his father's death. Jim's mother has deteriorated over the years, and she's taken to screaming at him over her communicator, and he has taken, not for the first time, to drinking. It's a sloppy, drunken kiss, wet with tears and whiskey that Bones breaks because he's scared Jim is too drunk to say yes. He puts him to bed and treats his hangover the next day, extra gentle with him, but they never speak of it again.</p><p>It's so long before their second kiss that Bones has almost forgotten the moment of chemistry, forgot how much he wanted Jim in that moment. Sure, he loves him, but they're best friends, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Third Time Lucky

The first time Leonard kisses Jim Kirk was at the end of their second year of the Academy, on Jim's 25th birthday and the 25th anniversary of his father's death. Jim's mother has deteriorated over the years, and she's taken to screaming at him over her communicator, and he has taken, not for the first time, to drinking. It's a sloppy, drunken kiss, wet with tears and whiskey that Bones breaks because he's scared Jim is too drunk to say yes. He puts him to bed and treats his hangover the next day, extra gentle with him, but they never speak of it again.

It's so long before their second kiss that Bones has almost forgotten the moment of chemistry, forgot how much he wanted Jim in that moment. Sure, he loves him, but they're best friends, _right_? 

He can't help, though, but be jealous of Spock. Spock who has come along out of nowhere, and despite having ejected Kirk from the Enterprise, and assaulted him on his return, it still feels like Spock has stolen a part of his best friend. He sees the way they look at each other, and he wants a part of that. But he's not one to ask, and he's not one to initiate, so he doesn't. But fuck does he feel lonely. 

And then Jim dies. It stabs at something deep in Leonard, inside of _Bones_. A reminder of something they should have had but never took. If he'd been lonely before, he's broken hearted now. He spends almost all day every day at Jim's bedside, tending him so much a nurse accuses him of actually hindering his recovery, and tells him to go to bed. He does so, but like the previous nights, he barely sleeps and wakes with damp pillows and tear tracked cheeks. But he's alive, and Leonard knows he's crying for what  _nearly_ happened. He's not jealous of Spock any more, not really. He's just grateful for a second chance. 

When he finally comes around, he doesn't pounce Jim. He gives Spock his due credit, and ignores the little spark of jealousy in his chest when the two reunite.

No, they don't kiss again for another year. It's the day after the memorial, just after the announcement of the five year mission, and McCoy is nervous about Space. Jim isn't, though, he's ecstatic, buzzing with an energy that had been taken from him when Pike died. The warmth even passes into Bones, and he wonders around smiling when no one is looking. 

That evening there's a crew party, they've hired out half of a huge hotel in San Francisco. There's lights and music and dancing and cocktails, and Bones takes the evening to enjoy it, getting moderately drunk at the bar - on synthehol, always mindful of his liver, and of the price of drinks in clubs when he has better in his own medicine cabinet. Jim clearly intends on making an entrance, because he's not there at the beginning of the party. Spock makes it in at the exact second it's due to start, 8pm, but most of the crew has nothing better to do and is already there. They applaud him, probably more because they're in the mood to applaud everyone and everything than his recent commendation for bravery.

The commendation is what Bones applauds though, for going off and hauling Khan back and dragging Jim kicking and screaming back to life. He'll love the damn hobgoblin forever for that one, and he doesn't bother to hide his grin as he thinks about it.

Suddenly a voice shouts above the music at the bartender. "Hey, got any Antarean brandy? I'll have a double."

He turns around to see Starfleet's golden boy downing a double shot of blue booze behind a young Ensign and her plus one. Somehow Jim's made it into the room with nobody noticing and slipped up behind him. 

"Jim!" He exclaims over the music. 

Kirk meets his gaze, eyes crystal clear and dancing. He laughs in that giddy happiness that only space-crazed fools can pull off these days. "Bones! Knew I'd find ya here!" He's already drunk, but not quite wasted yet, not like he was that first time. 

Bones gets off his stool to circumnavigate the officer between him and his friend, but Jim beats him to it, bouncing around them and flinging his arms about him in a friendly hug. 

"Fuck man, I'm so happy I could kiss you!" And before Bones has a second to make some kind of sardonic remark to get them out of the situation, he does. It was meant to be a joke, a friendly kiss, and McCoy was meant to sit there tight lipped and scowl, but he's on his third drink and he doesn't want to. He kisses him, softly, because Jim is something precious to him that he needs to protect, and he doesn't care if anyone knows that right now. His fingers curl in the back of Jim's shirt and when the chaste kiss ends and Kirk pulls back to look at him questioningly, he shuts his eyes tight against the conflicting but equally urgent needs to cry with happiness that Jim is back with him, and to escape the inevitable rejection and embarrassment. 

Jim's voice is gentle when he speaks and for some reason Leonard isn't prepared for it. He can barely hear it over the music, but he refuses to open his eyes to watch Jim's lips moving. "Bones? Hey, you okay?" Jim's hands are still on both of his arms. They rub gently, and the Doctor can't say anything because it's all too much at once and if he does he thinks he'll cry. "You wanna get out of here?"

He nods and lets his Captain guide him out of the room, somehow passing unnoticed between members of the crew. They stop on an empty landing in the hotel that Bones hasn't been to before, the silence stretching between them for the entire journey.

He can't look at Jim, so he stares instead at the unnecessarily ornate carpet at his feet. 

"Bones? What's wrong?" Jim's voice is still soft. He reaches out and squeezes McCoy's arm, and Leonard walks straight into the unoffered embrace, hiding his face in Jim's shoulder. 

"Sorry," He mumbles. He's not sure why, but he feels that he is.

"It's okay..." There's a pause between them that Jim only just manages to fill before it becomes too uncomfortable and Bones has to move away. "Why did you kiss me?"

Leonard wants to flee, but another arm is now across his back and Jim is holding him as though he's sobbing, which he isn't, because now instead of being overwhelmed by grief and relief, he's clammy with anxiety. He can't lie about this. He can't do anything but give into it.

He leaves the next pause too long for Jim, who removes his hand from his arm and pulls his face up by his hair, gently. 

Leonard is frozen, and for a second it's like he is aware of every single cell in his body, before his hands go numb. He can hear his pulse, no, _feel_ it in his ear canal. 

They're only a few inches apart, but Jim leans closer until McCoy can feel the breath coming out in hot puffs on his cheek. Bones is somewhere between hyperventilating and sobbing, and his breaths don't slow until he's inhaling the air Jim is exhaling, the best substitute for a brown paper bag the universe could offer. 

He can't remember who sealed their lips, but someone did and he can feel the heat of Jim's open mouth against his, taste Antarean brandy on the tongue that licks into his mouth. He loses any skill at kissing he might've gained throughout his life, because suddenly all he can think about is being as close to Kirk as humanly possible, and that means being halfway down his throat. 

When they finally break for air, his cheeks are wet. 

"Please." It's all he can say, caught between shame and the deepest need he's ever felt, not for sex, just for closeness. 

They stay in the embrace, pressing occasional chaste kisses to each other's lips, cheeks, eyelids.  _I love you._  He thinks so loudly that people in the party downstairs can hear it. He knows Jim does.

Third time's the charm. 

**Author's Note:**

> Wow I wrote a thing and it isn't even porn or violent.


End file.
